I recently completed my Mormon.org profile, and I must say it is fabulous. Yet I find myself a little disappointed that it got overshadowed by this Brandon Flowers guy. Sure, he’s talented and famous and all, but I spent a good 30 minutes writing my profile, and figured it would at least be in the main rotation. One would think that NOT belonging to an organization called “The Killers” would be a GOOD thing. Guess not.
It also appears that the Church continues to ignore my request for a fake membership number so I could do an MMM profile – I imagine that would have generated some serious homepage traffic. But, I’m not bitter. I proudly embrace my humility.
Here is a screenshot of Brandon’s profile:
Yes. The Church has lumped me into the 2nd category away from death. When I leave this age bracket, the next one has no end, merely a “+” sign. That bracket is the end. The big finish. The Spirit World. It is “Hie to Kolob” time.
Would it have been that difficult to put a ’50-59′, ’60-69′, ’70-79′, and then an ’80+death’ bracket? That way I would be right in the middle. Right in the prime of my life. But no… now every time I visit myself on Mormon.org, my mortality is thrown in my face. I’m not ready to go… I still have so much to do…
Maybe it’s not to late to start a band. Anyone?
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Hmmmm. Middle aged???
Mr. Brandon Flowers was in my ward growing up in Nephi. It’s in the fine print of his Wikipedia page that he actually did most of his growing-up in such a great small Utah town. I am sure that is what made him want to kill people, is what I’m trying to say.
So do I get any credit for his fame and fortune? No. But I recognize some of the people mentioned in his songs! And I would probably listen to him, even if he didn’t live just down the street from me whilst we grew up. I like his music.
And his profile on Mormon.org.
Diane: Maybe it’s because you are Canadian.
Laughed from start to finish. And at the comments, too!
And I am in the same near-death category as you!
And is this the time to admit that Mormon.org has NEVER published my site? I filled it out months and months ago. What does that say about me? Or them?Sniff!
If you have John Barney commenting on your blog, then you truly have a one-way pass into the celestial kingdom. I am seriously considering dropping his name when I get to the pearly gates…which should be approx 40 years after you do. 🙂 he heh….My only problem with mormon.org front page is that those people look NOTHING like anyone who I sit next to in the pews. I want the regular joes/janes to get their day in the sunlight for once!
You are as old as my dad too! Don’t worry he isn’t nearly as funny as you. Don’t “they” say the more you laugh the longer you live? I am assuming of course that you laugh at yourself. You also reminded me that I need to get my temple recommend renewed. This whole “they last 2 years” thing really messes me up. I keep thinking I have another year but I don’t…
2nd category away from death made me giggle…
I didn’t realize were to do this Mormon profile thing… I don’t know if I wanna… It’s not a commandment, is it?
Ha ha. That’s funny, I don’t care who y’are? You’ll always be a middle-aged Mormon fellow to me.
You mean you are the same age as my dad? HAHAHAHAHA!
🙂 That’s a good thing. My mom has always said she had kids so my dad would have somebody to play with he’s such a kid at heart.
Have they changed how to answer questions? I was one of the first to fill out a profile but we were able to choose which questions we wanted to answer.
I laughed all the way through this. Mostly because I am in the same bracket as you and it is better to laugh than cry.
Wow, you’re really, really old. 😉 I, however, am THREE categories away from death. Wait… that doesn’t sound much better…
Yeah, it’s gotta be a drag always walking around with one foot in the grave like that. But look at the bright side… there’s lots of music stars in your age group that still totally have it goin’ on! Barry Manilow, Neil Diamond, Julio Iglesias, Wayne Newton.
On second thought, nevermind. I’m so sorry for your loss. 🙁
You got cool questions on mormon.org. I got a tough one. I had to answer the following, “Justify, in 500 words or less, the law of health contained in the Word of Wisdom against the propensity for refreshments and treats at every mormon gathering.”
Better get that will ready.
Band names: The Hip Breakers or Where’s My Teeth? Or Oops, I Gotta Pee Again.
Just trying to help a guy out.
(Anon/M) Oh, stop whining. I am in the 65+ (to death) and I am not complaining (well, I am, but it would do no good). Still in no hurry to “Hie to Kolob)”, but when I do, I’ll giggle all the way because that song is the most ridiculous one in the hymn book.