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How Not to Start a Talk

Ever since I started this blog,  I was planning on writing a post about the things we do when beginning a talk in church that drive me crazy. I had four or five items to address – items you are all familiar with – but I never got around to writing it out.

Lo and behold, last night a good friend sent me a link to an educational video that demonstrates this mater far better than I could ever explain it. Think of it as an introductory course on “How NOT to Begin a Talk in Sacrament Meeting.”

Now I realize this video is five years old, and that many of you have already seen it, but it is new to me. And it is well worth two minutes of your time. I promise.

My thanks to Shawn Rapier. I think I’ll go back to bed for a few minutes.


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Comments

  1. This is like 80% of our ward, but it doesn’t help that at least half the ward is related to one of the members of the bishopric! We’ve also heard some pretty “Did he just say that over the pulpit?” moments too. Just last week.. a speaker said “Well, steers try.”

  2. Such a good video. First time I saw it I was preparing a talk for sacrament meeting. I may or may not have gone back and altered anything in my talk……

    1. I remember that post, Freja…. that one and your testimony post which I remember every 1st Sunday of the month 🙂

  3. Great video and so true!! The only thing he forgot was the first word out of his mouth should be “Um” and then “um” every few words!!

  4. Wait…he forgot about the part about waiting to prepare his comedy/talk until late Saturday night or early Sunday morning.

  5. As far as worrying that everyone else has seen something already, I present to you . . . this:

    http://xkcd.com/1053/

    It is my favorite panel, because it’s how people should act once they’re older than 12.

    Thanks for the laugh once more, I love that comedy skit! And I always try NOT to do any of them anymore.

  6. I have an idea how not to start a talk. “I have been waiting for the opportunity to speak in church today. This will be the first week in many weeks that I will actually stay awake during one whole talk.” The speakers are awesome in my ward…I’m just tired. Just sayin…

  7. I HAVE to repost this on my blog!! Last Sunday our (SOMEWHAT) adult speaker got up and began his talk with…and I kid you not… ( one eyebrow raised, his body slightly turned to the left and his head facing straight to the congregation)”For those of you who don’t know me…well that’s too bad, cuz Ima-kool-guy!”…in true Gaston voice.Ugh! His wife is the sweetest woman. I was embarrassed for her. Why do people DO things like that?

  8. So funny….

    “For those of you that don’t know me, my name is Lene. For those of you that do know me we can just continue with you calling me Your Majesty.”

  9. Great vid, MMM. Back in the day when I was in MIA (that’s how long ago it was…) we used to get some training on how to give talks.

    Alas, we are a church of amatuers, not professional speakers.

    We do have one member of our bishopric who, when he asks someone to speak, tells them they may NOT mention him in their talks. So only about half do…

  10. So a brother in our ward started his talk with a joke that was very funny. I can’t remember the talk but I do remember the joke. What does that say?

  11. We had an older gentlemen (former mission pres, bishop, etc) that gave a talk to the youth a year or two ago. He TAUGHT them how to give a talk and what isn’t appropriate to say. It made a huge difference. Too bad he moved away or it might be helpful to give it to the adults!

  12. Excellent. That was spot on! I like that he could just joke about it because I would tend to rant about it. I can’t remember the last time I heard a talk that didn’t start that way…

  13. Hilarious! I doubt I’ll be able to suppress a smile at the beginning of most talks from now on, and the speaker will no doubt think I think his opening is funny!

    In my current ward, there’s a new line added to easily a third of the talks: “I’m so relieved that Elder [Apostle] isn’t here today — man, would I be nervous!” Or, alternatively, “I didn’t think I could possibly be more nervous, until I saw Elder [Apostle] here today!” (Elder [Apostle] always smiles patiently, but he must be sooooooo tired of that.)

  14. And maybe it’s just that the people in my ward that like to start off their talks with jokes always use those jokes to poke fun of someone else (favorite targets are bishopric members or other auxiliary leaders). :S Maybe it wouldn’t feel so awkward or wrong if it really was just a funny little joke to break the ice… :S

    Thankfully, I don’t think most people do this. Unfortunately, some do.

  15. I didn’t think I’d really have a comment (haha that is funny) about this until we got to the “I’ll get even with you” bit. My husband is in the bishopric. They plan the speakers and the topics very seriously and very prayerfully. Also, my husband is about the nicest guy you could ever know. He loves the people in our ward and they know it. It hurts my heart on two counts when people act like that: one, they are NOT out to get you, it is not a punishment! And two, it makes my husband sad that to hear over and over that no one wants to answer the phone when he is calling and joke that they don’t like him as much as they used to. It’s lame. You can be scared, you can be uncomfortable, but don’t blame the bishopric for what is probably direction from the Lord to have you speak. Thanks for offering me a soapbox, MMM, because even though we promote you all the time, I don’t think you have too many readers in our ward. 😉 We will continue to suggest you, though!

  16. I do think they have a sense of humor. And I love to laugh. I just have a hard time when a speaker tells a joke that detracts from the spirit instead of contributing to it. I think there is a time and a place for comedy.

  17. Oh that was perfect!! Thank you, MMM! I’d never heard of that guy till now! Sariah, personally I think God and Jesus have a sense of humor…

  18. LOL Funny, and so true! That, and starting your talk with jokes that may, or may not, be funny and usually don’t even have anything to do with the topic. Telling a funny story that relates, sure – it often helps make a point. But just starting a talk with a joke just to open or try to be funny really doesn’t have a place in Sacrament Meeting (IMO), especially when we consider the very last words that the speaker says are, “In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.” :S But like I said, that’s just my opinion…

    Oops, sorry, uh, I’ll give back the soap box now. 😉

  19. super! hahaha!! Every Sunday at my ward, by one or more, all of those things get said. 😛
    I’m not sure if that was correct grammar. Oh well.

  20. Okay, I had NOT seen that yet, and I have to admit – he has it spot on. I may or may not now have some NEW mocking material next time I’m asked to speak.

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