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| Jozef Israels (1824-1911) Saying Grace |
“Saying Grace” is a religious tradition that spans most faiths. The idea is to give thanks to God for our food, and ask Him to bless it. In my LDS experience, few have called it “Saying Grace”. To me, it has always been either “Bless the Food,” or “Say the Prayer.”
I think I prefer “Saying Grace.”
I did have a missionary companion who took the idea of “blessing the food” to a much more literal level than I had seen before. We would bow our heads at the table, and he would pronounce the blessing, which would be something like this:
“In the name of Jesus Christ, and by the power of the priesthood, we bless this food for our use. Amen.”
As a junior companion, I never took it upon myself to say, “Are you nuts?” but I did gently broach the subject once as to the appropriateness of his mealtime prayer. His response was that it was similar to a priesthood ordinance, and we had the priesthood.
This was new and strange to me, and the idea didn’t stick. Mostly because he did not use the specific word that is supposed to be used in all Mormon food blessings. That word is:
nourishandstrengthenourbodiesanddousthegoodthatweneed.
He didn’t even try to incorporate the word into his prayer – let alone run it together correctly. Heretic. I just stuck with the tried-and-true that I had been raised with. Yep. I had my own vain repetitions, and I was gonna use them. Still do.
When we “bless the food”, are we “blessing the food?” Aren’t we really asking God to bless the food? Sometimes it feels a bit silly. I have smiled many times while listening to someone “bless” the donuts or cookies to make us healthy. I have also felt the food go cold around me, and peeked to see a crusty layer form on the top of the gravy, as someone turns the mealtime prayer into an endurance event.
To me, the most important part of “Saying Grace” is “Grace.” The word itself teaches us a lot. The Latin and Greek origins meant “favor,” or “thankful,” or “praises.” All elements that were lacking in the blessing by my companion.
We use the word “grace” in our worship. It means an unmerited sanctification through divine assistance. Christ gives us grace. We are saved by grace. (Ephesians 2:8)
Could it be that our grace brings about God’s grace and sanctifies our meal? Doesn’t coming to God with a humility and gratitude sanctify us as well?
The part of my companion’s prayer that bothered me was the complete lack of gratitude – the complete lack of grace in his edict. Even though I say the words “We are thankful for his food,” most of the time, my prayers lack grace as well. On occasion, I will feel the words, but far too often, it is a tradition for tradition’s sake.
I know, there are only so many ways to pray over a plate of food, and I’m not suggesting this is a big deal that will keep us out of heaven – but I am suggesting that every little bit of sincere gratitude we express to our God is a good thing.
Our family sits at the table to say grace. We kneel for family prayers, and keep the two distinct. (We like warm food) Family prayers are much more detailed, involved and longer. We like to keep mealtime prayers short. Not ridiculously short – but on topic.
Sometimes we bring carry-out home, and we always pray over it. I have always expressed gratitude for my EC when she prepares a meal. So I decided to start expressing gratitude fro the people who prepared my food – even if it came from Pizza Hut. I like the feel of it, and the kids have picked it up too.
Blessing a table of cheesecakes so that God will nourishandstrengthenourbodiesanddousthegoodthatweneed can feel silly, but I have no problem at all expressing gratitude to God and the people who provided the cheesecake. Cheesecake is delicious, and God should be thanked for inspiring whoever invented it.
I don’t pray over my food in public. Often I will see a devout person with their head briefly bowed before they dig into their chicken sandwich at Wendy’s – I don’t do it – but I admire and respect those who do. I have seen couples who hold hands and pray in restaurants – out loud. I don’t have much use for that…
It is easy to find things to be thankful for, and to express gratitude during this season. It is harder when you are eating leftover whatever, and you know you are going to be late for your meeting…
Today as you gather around the table, pause for a moment and think about “Saying Grace.” The question may not be as to what you are going to say, rather…do you mean it?
3 additional things:
1) Here is an interesting link to BeliefNet, where members of different faiths share their mealtime prayers. (here)
2) What are your family traditions regarding blessing the food? I would be curious to know -especially those from other countries.
3) Yes, I have heard “Sons of Provo.”
I just remembered that no one has mentioned “please bless the hands that prepared it.” I’ve always had a problem with that phrase. Don’t the rest of their bodies need the blessings too?
Our go-to mealtime prayer when I was growing up was, “God is great, God is good, God we than thee for this food.” My parents wanted us to be able to participate in family meal time, so I guess it did the trick.
DH, however, insists that our kids say grace the “proper” way. He wants them to understand that when we pray, we’re talking to God, even if it is to bless our food. I agree, but sometimes I really wish he’d let me say what I was taught….especially when my stomach is growling, lol.
My 5yr old niece blessed the food I prepared and said “Please bless the food to taste good” Not sure if I should have been offended or not but I thought it was pretty funny and also a great idea!
I’ve been giving this post lots of thought, so I’m back with more thoughts to share….
We watched 17 miracles as a family Sunday evening, and I began to wonder about the origins of the word
nourishandstrengthenourbodiesanddousthegoodthatweneed
Perhaps it started with the pioneers crossing the plains who had little food, and at times were given to boiling rawhide so that they could chew on it. They most certainly might utter the words “bless this food that it might nourish and strengthen our bodies and do us the good that we need” for whatever meager little food that they had. Then little children hearing their parents and grandparents pray “the word” would learn to pray that way, and it gets passed down through the generations.
My grandmother was a descendant from the pioneers, and I remember hearing “the word” at her dinner table first. She spoke that prayer with respect and reverence and gratitude, and I thought “the word” must be somehow extra special, since I’d never heard it before and I felt differently when she prayed.
As I got older, I noticed others saying “the word” at church functions when we asked a blessing on the food. I also admit to having used it myself on occasion. But when eating refreshments or at a dessert bar, I simply give thanks and ask that we might enjoy ourselves and the refreshments.
Thanks for writing this post – it’s been much food for thought over the last few days. It’s inspired me to revisit the scriptures and search out the many different times the Savior prayed, and how he taught people to pray.
At a dessert pot-luck I heard this one, “bless this food that it may fulfill the purpose for which it was provided.” I liked it, because if it was provided so that we could have time to visit after our meeting, it fulfilled its purpose and didn’t have to nourish or stengthen us.
I have heard about and seen photos that show the energy (light)that comes from food and the difference from food that is blessed (colorful, bright, beautiful) and food that isn’t (dark, murky, sluggish). There’s lots of scientific research to back it up. Dr. Masaru Emoto has photos showing how words affect water molecules – totally interesting stuff considering we a primarily composed of water! Makes me pause to consider the words I use about myself and others. Here’s a link to see the photos, if you want:
http://www.bariumblues.com/conscious_water_crystals.html
I know it sounds kinda Twilight Zone to some (sorry MMM for the use of that “Twilight” word), but aren’t we a faith that believes in pre/post mortal life, angels, spirits and visitations from an unseen world? I know there is TONS of stuff going on around us that we can’t see – Plato and CS Lewis said so, not to mention our prophets! The Savior emphasized the huge import of taking the sacrament and blessing it properly. Why would our daily food be any different?
Because the sacrament is a saving, priesthood ordinance. A double cheesebuger and a large Frosty are not.
However, I must admit that I do prefer the concept of “Saying Grace”. First, it’s more poetic; second, it does include the gratitude we want to show our Father.
I’m grateful that you provided me with a Christmas gift for my dad. (My comments are never really related to the posts, are they?)
We just say thanks for the food and please bless it. I don’t ask it to be blessed any way. I really don’t like the “heathandstrengthen” phrase.
Bless the food and those who eat it! Fatten the bodies of those who need it, but if you find I’m way too chubby … put it on my skinny hubby!
All I know is that I wished I would have asked for a blessing on the food I ate from Taco Bell because I have never been so sick in my life. My cough sounded just like the guy who handed it to me. Fool me once……
I recently heard a friend refer to it as ‘asking a blessing on the food’. Which I liked. Because we aren’t blessing it, we are asking the Lord to bless it.
I agree with being thankful being the main point.
We have extended family of different religious backgrounds, and call it “saying grace” when with them. When at home we ‘bless the food’. I especially like the idea of ‘blessing the food’, when you’re at a potluck, and don’t know which kitchen the food came from, or how long it’s been sitting out. I once had a RS president that refused to eat at potlucks, unless she knew which dish came from which house, and then would only eat from certain houses. (Mine was one she would eat from, she frequently asked me what I brought). I would think to myself, “Get over it already! The food’s been blessed!!”
In her defense, we had some destitute families living in some dire circumstances (think Health Department)living in the ward at the time, who also brought food.
I hope your comp is reading this so he knows he’s nuts.
http://www.bensopinion.com
Love it! When I was little, you didn’t get “asked” to the “the prayer”, you got ordered from my father. Whether said person who was asked was in a pi**y teenager mood or not. For as long as I can remember of being a child, it went this way for anybody who “the prayer”
“heavenlyfatherblesthefoodthankya’feritnameajesuschristamen”
at about 200 mph. I’ve personally always doubted that Heavenly Father even got to hear it, let alone bless it. Probably why I got all those bronchial things every year.
We do private prayers over the food when we eat out, that way the kids can do it as quickly or …longly…. as they want. And I get to eat.
I’ve heard people joke about blessing their groceries before putting them away, but I don’t think that would work for us; I’m in far too much of a bad mood after grocery shopping to be thankful for THAT experience.
Thank you, MMM . . . just . . . thank you . . . =o)
This is completely irreverent after your very nice post, but every time I hear the phrase “say grace” I think of the line from Christmas Vacation: “Grace? She died 30 years ago.”
My family is of mixed religions, so we generally call it saying grace. I like the sound of it. And it’s okay to use the same words each time. I think it only becomes vain repetition when the sincerity is lost.
Re – the eating out thing: Why not have your prayer on the food in the car before you enter the restaurant? You don’t have it yet, but your are going to get it, aren’t you? Then it is personal and private.
Good idea.
I’ve ALWAYS thought that. Personally, I’m kind of against it in public. And I don’t even know why. It’s not like it’s a big bad thing, for cryin’ out loud. 🙂
I recall reading in the scriptures (I think D&C, but don’t hold me to that) that we are to thank the Lord for our food, but I have never read anywhere that he needs to “bless it.” I had a returned missionary roommate who would tell us we had to “remove the curse” from the food and nagged us if we ate before praying. I’ve never read anything about that either. So we stick to being thankful for what we have and asking that we will be able to keep our bodies healthy.
I feel like my 2-year-old has it pretty well figured out. “Favver in Heaven, ah bow our heads…ah give fanks for food. Ah name ah Jesus Christ, AMEN”
I tried, a few times, to get him to say more, but he responds “I said AMEN.” Short and sweet. At least he does the most important thing — giving thanks.
…Plus, when he prays, we get to eat sooner! 😉
We also pray out loud quietly in public. Uusally picking a centrally seated individual to be the spokesperson. I figure if you can have a private conversation with each other, you can have a quiet conversation with God.
My grandpa would make us stop and pray in Arby’s and I was humiliated. Just last week out to lunch with my mom, she stopped, bowed her head and said a quick prayer. I wasn’t embarrassed at all. I figured if she felt comfortable, then so be it, but I wasn’t letting my milkshake melt.
Oftentimes, the only time we have ALL the boys and wives together is at a mealtime so when they are home (usually Sunday diner), we make it more of a family prayer. I figure if the food gets cold, there’s a perfectly good microwave.
Dad family was Catholic so when they said prayers over food, I never knew when it was time to say amen and be done or just say amen and keep my head bowed and going or to just sit quiet until I heard people actually dishing food. So confusing.
Here is some history. The first spoken prayer was given by Hannah. This is why the High Priest thought she was drunk. She was using the words of her mouth -something not usually done, unless you were offering sacrifice in the Holy of Holies. This show’s Hannah’s faithfulness. That she would have the faith to pray aloud at the Temple. When you look at the Passover story, you will see that they placed a mark upon the door frames of their houses -this was their blessing of the food- you might say. There were no spoken words, prayers were action… It is a higher law to pray aloud. Scholars believe the high priests during the exile of the Jews went back into the bible and added the Temple rites into the stories, so that they would be recorded, but only recognized by those in authority. So blessing the food, is not a priesthood ordinance, but it should remind us of the ordinances in the Temple.
First spoken prayer? I’m not understanding. Do you mean the first mealtime prayer? Because there are multiple examples of prayer before Hannah’s time.
The bible was not written in chronological order. In fact the creation story was one of the last things written during the exile and added then added to the beginning. The majority of the bible, was written during the reign of the kings- and any “templey” stuff ie; prayer, mount Sinai, Ester (that is a whole ‘nother cool story) was written in later by the Temple Priests, during the exile, so it would be preserved. They aren’t made up parts of the story, the are just parts that are only learned in the Temple, so they were kept out of scripture. (1st temple- the one Melchizedek was in charge of, not second- that was corrupt) Then once they lost the Temple, they needed to preserve it, but not make it obvious to the average person reading the text. I mean, they just had everything destroyed. They were afraid) This is a mix of Margret Bakers work, and BYU Old Testament people (official name) and things my professor has claimed. But Hannnah is the earliest recorded instance we have of anyone praying out loud outside the Temple.
Except it is wrong.
We know Adam and Eve “called upon God” from outside the Garden of Eden, after they were cast out. He was also commanded to call upon the name of the Lord forever more. (Moses 5)
While Hannah might be the first recorded that moved her lips when she prayed, but it says in vs. 13 that she wasn’t audible. (Which begs the question as to who could have written down what she said.)
And there are oodles of references from the Pentateuch that talk about prophets praying to God that make no distinction as to it being out loud or not. So it is quite a leap to make the claim that Hannah was the first.
Except you are almost there…
The account with Adam is called the “second” creation story, and dates to about 800-50 (approx.) B.C.Its all a temple story anyway- so of course he prayed. The Prophets only pray when the offer sacrifice. The only exception to this is when they are having a face to face meeting with God. Even to this day, Jews do not pray out loud or audibly (its more like a mumble or a whisper) outside the Temple- which they dont have. Or They sing. The Torah when read aloud is in song. The record that involves Hannah dates to about 100 years earlier. That is solid. No scholar disputes that. Not being audible does not been there was no sound.
But its all just theory anyway, I will have a face to face meeting tonight and let you know what goes down.
And moving your lips does not mean there was sound –
Doesn’t matter when it was written – it matters when it happened. I’ll stick with the Pearl of Great Price, and call the win for Adam & Eve.
Ummm…Shantel I’ll just assume that you don’t know anybody who is a practicing Jew (like my Uncle, Aunt and my cousins). Not convert Jews–real Jews from the motherland. Jews do pray. They pray silently and out loud. They pray at synagogue, at home, on holidays, individually and in groups. As far as prayer goes the only “controversy” is whether you should still pray in Hebrew or in your native tongue (my family does both). As far as your history goes, you are suggesting that the commandment to pray in Duet & Numbers was “invented” or “inserted” by the scribes at the time of the kings? Kinda bizarre. In any case, tour ignorance of the basic fact that Jews do pray discredits anything else you’re trying to present as fact.
I completely agree with everything you said, except that part about cheesecake being delicious.
There are many anecdotes I could share, but more than anything b’sides the unique blend of humor and meat in your writings, I’m grateful for people (like you) who share their experiences in a way that touches me, reminds me to be better, and do better. So, today thank YOU, for a little slice of grace.
We hold hands at mealtime prayers around the table. I have a sneaking suspicion that this tradition stemmed from my parents wanting to keep kids from loading their plates while prayer is being said. Over time it morphed into hand-squeezing that went the full circle and sometimes turned into less than gentle squeezing as well…
Is there any doctrinal reference that we are supposed to bless the food or ask for it to be blessed? Expressing thanks for our meals seems to be what’s important, so grace is more fitting. I also don’t pray in public restaurants. For me it would be praying to be seen as the hypocrites do. I have nothing against other people who want to, though.
Always an interesting read here – thank you!
We pray over meals, snacks, takeout food, and we’re that family praying aloud in the restaurant (quietly, but loud enough to be heard over the 7 little ones).
No real rote phrases here – the kids keep it interesting. You never know what they will say – esp. if it is a meal they don’t like!
And for this I am grateful. Amen