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“The Flaming Poo Bag of Life”

Flaming bag

Yesterday I posited the following question on Facebook:

Why is it that every time I have a tremendously spiritual weekend, the next week begins with life ringing my doorbell and leaving a flaming paper bag of dog poop on my doorstep?

Conference weekend was wonderful. It was peaceful, deeply spiritual and very much needed. Then, Monday came and brought with it all sorts of bad things. Tuesday tagged in and continued the beat down.

It isn’t really just a post-Conference anomaly. It seems that there have been many times that a spiritual experience or period of increased spiritual growth is often followed quickly by disaster. The disaster can be a medical emergency, family crisis, things start breaking, work problems, unexpected financial problems, etc.

– Before I go on, it occurred to me that some of you might not understand the flaming bag reference. Here it is in a nutshell: It is a classic prank that I may, or may not have participated in in my youth. You take an ordinary paper bag and fill it with some dog poop. Then you put it on someone’s doorstep, set it on fire, and ring the doorbell. Oh, and run!

The unfortunate victim opens the door, sees the fire and immediately stomps the fire out. Get it? I know it is a terrible, immature thing – which is probably illegal and immoral. (Kids who are reading this, do NOT try this at home.)

But that’s sometimes how I feel the day after Conference. I open the front door on Monday morning, expecting to find beautiful rainbows and happy, chirping birds, only to look down and see a flaming bag of dog poop at my front door. (Metaphorically speaking.)

After posting this crude analogy on Facebook yesterday, I learned something fascinating:

I am not alone.

Apparently, many of you experience the same thing: A post-spiritual high smackdown. Somehow, that makes me feel a little better, knowing that God, or Satan, didn’t single ME out, but that lot of others have the same challenges.

At last count there were well over 100 comments on that Facebook thread. Some of them were quite profound, and I figure that I might as well share some of them. They offer different viewpoints on why the smack down happens, and what to do about it.

(Mindi came up with the title “The Flaming Poo Bag of Life.” So blame her, not me.)

• Velva Williams: First you learn the material and then you are tested on it. Thats just how it goes.

Very matter-of fact approach, and very true. We do get tested on the things we learn- sometimes sooner than we would like.

• Chris Butler followed up by citing a Elder Bednar’s Conference talk that was given just days earlier: Because your 4×4 needs a load to keep you moving. The test is-can you keep that same spirit you felt this weekend, even in the face of this new trial?

Of course some people don’t listen to Conference as carefully as Chris. Case in point:

• Cathy Smart: The Flaming Poo-Bag of Life…Another GREAT conference talk by Pres. Uchtdorf. I wonder where the plane will fit in. OHHHH the anticipation has me in it’s grips already!!

• Leonard Browne made an interesting suggestion: Life: “Knock, knock. . .good morning. . .Beelzebub suggested I stop by to check on you. Anything you don’t need today?”

• Margaret Ellen Floyd was on the same track when she said, God and Christ and Holy Spirit which we all were privileged to feel this weekend; the Adversary just has to poke his nose up and say “I am here too!!!!”  But that’s just my opinion.

• Cliff Merrill added, Life tries to find a way to put the spiritual fire out as quickly as possible. The good news, it means you were well feed spiritually because I know others who commented it was just another weekend and a normal week. No pain, no gain.

I assume there are multiple reasons for the challenges we face immediately after a spiritual high.

• Satan. He desires to knock us down a peg, because he hates us and doesn’t want us functioning at a higher state of spirituality.

• Coincidence. Bad things do happen in life. Maybe the are just more noticeable immediately following conference because of this:

• Contrast. Spending the weekend in my home, with my family watching God’s chosen servants teach me how to have a better life, sustaining those leaders, and eating an occasional donut – what wouldn’t feel like a downer after that?

 

Does knowing that it happens to other people make the challenges any less real? No, but knowing that we have a shared struggle, and that we can laugh about it does make the burden lighter.

Do you know what helps even more? Returning to the things we were taught just this past weekend. It seems that turbulence and tornados were a major theme in this Conference.

Elder Nelson talked about how our faith will be tested. President Uchtdorf talked about how we need to find gratitude in our circumstances. Elder Bednar went as far as to say that those burdens are good for us, and give us “spiritual traction.” And those were merely three of many talks that specifically relate to the topic.

The Lord has blessed us with such wonderful counsel, that we really shouldn’t be surprised that we are immediately put to the test to see if we learned anything.

I do get points for consistency: Last year, the day after Conference, I wrote about how my “Post-Conference High” took a beating the very next day. LInk: Wow, That Was Fast.

Derek Crimin posted a link to a terrific talk from Elder Holland that addresses this very subject, without referencing flaming bags of anything. He does reference Moses and Joseph Smith. (Further clarifying the tremendous gulf between Elder Holland and me.  I highly recommend this talk: “Cast Not Away Therefore Your Confidence.”

Conference weekend is gone. Thankfully, we get six-months to take it our for a spin and let it bless out lives. Or, we can act like it never happened,.

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Comments

  1. Love this from How Firm a Foundation (verse 5): “When through fiery trials thy pathway shall lie, My grace, all sufficient, shall be thy supply. The flame shall not hurt thee; I only design Thy dross to consume, and thy gold to refine.”

  2. It’s good to know I’m not the only one. Conference was AMAZING. UPLIFTING. ENLIGHTENING. And it was wonderful to feel the intensity of Holy Spirit bearing witness of the truthfulness of the things I was being taught. I felt rather low on Monday when I was out and about so I said a quick prayer in my car on my way to do errands and ba-da-boom!
    I had two wonderful experiences involving people I had never met before. One was at the DMV (I know, UNBELIEVABLE but TRUE she was an angel to me) and the other was in a shop but they were both so sweet and kind I told my daughter I felt like I had received hugs from Heaven. Truly my prayers were answered. That was Monday. Today is Wednesday and the bag of poo that I had averted on Monday has come full circle…kinda like a boomerang…
    The difference is now I don’t feel like such a spiritual pygmy.
    (that’s the opposite of a spiritual giant)

  3. I just look at it as opposition in all things. The opposition actually helps me have a testimony that General Conference is from God. Or that whatever spiritual high just experienced was real.

  4. Dog doo is totally urban/lame. Ersatz,even. Real flaming bags contain at least a quart of fresh cowpie. The best of everything originates in the country. Not that I have any PERSONAL experience with such pranks…

  5. This is what I meant by focus. Crap goes on all the time -all around us, and that is what it is. CRAP. People produce all sorts of garbage that we dont have to pay any attention to. Just keep moving forward, focus on the work, and put one foot in front of the other. As for me and my house -we are moving on!

  6. I enjoy your perspective so much!
    Thanks for including part of my comment, I know that the Adversary is determined that my testimony of him is as strong as my testimony of my Savoir and my Heavenly Father, but with the Holy Spirit to guide us, with the words of God out of the mouths of our Prophets and Apostles, I know we will stay on the straight and narrow… and out of the paths of the poo 🙂

    (The new address for my blog is SlightelyMormon.org, but with my recent marriage I may have to change the name!)

  7. Flaming bag of poo is the perfect description for my life right now. I’m trying hard not to step in it but the poo seems to be everywhere! 🙂

    “Cast Not Away Therefore Your Confidence” is one of my all-time favorite talks. I read it for the first time while visiting Las Vegas. Had an amazing spiritual experience there. In “Sin City”. Go figure.

  8. I think a lot of times it is just to see if we are paying attention to what was taught. I some times wonder if it is because we are paying attention that we notice the digs by the adversary. The majority of the time that we are living “in the world”, we may not be as aware of what is going on around us because we have not been as spiritually in tune.

    Most of our FOML’s were home for conference weekend, even though they will be back for Easter. Our RM was browsing the “library” and noticed a few books that she had never seen before and inquired. They were books that dealt with some of the topics discussed in conference. I have owned most of them since she was a teenager, but they just now caught her eye because they dealt with conference topics as well as some of her college classes. She was now more in-tune.

    Last thought, it could be Lehi’s legacy that there is opposition in all things. You can’t have the good without a balance of bad to go with it.

  9. Oh, and I had to look up “ferric.” Who uses that word? It’s a good description of many of Elder Holland’s talks, as well as others’. I probably won’t start using the word though, at least not in speech. People would wonder why I keep talking about ferrets.

  10. Hear hear. Although, I was being tested as the words were being spoken. Not only was I coming down with a nasty case of strep throat, but watching conference with 4 kids 6 and under isn’t always the most spiritual experience. Still there were definitely good moments.
    It’s like that song, “Love At Home.” I kind of have to laugh at it. I mean, “roses bloom beneath our feet…” really? Then I remember that roses have thorns, and so does family life, but that doesn’t make it any less beautiful.

  11. Wow. Your timing is excellent. I was praying about this just this morning. I have noticed a pattern of extreme frustration and overwhelmedness immediately following conference and was wondering why this happens, so I threw my hands up to Heavenly Father and he answered me through you!

    Thanks so much.

  12. I missed the facebook question, cause I’m trying to spend less time there, but I also have noticed the same phenomena. I think that if Satan can get us distracted, frustrated, and discouraged from the “smackdown”, he is hoping that we might forget some of the personal revelation that we’ve received, and the things that we’ve learned. Nothing quite like reviewing last conference’s notes in anticipation of the upcoming conference, to find that one of my conference questions had already been asked and answered. Oops.
    Had that happen post temple attendance too. One day following a rather personal instructive temple session, I got into a depressive funk that helped me lose sight of the ‘education’ I had received. Now I just expect it. And try to write down my impressions ASAP.

  13. Flaming Poo Bag of Life. As a South Park Mormon, I smile knowing there’s hope for you.

  14. I call it the “Moses phenomenon.” What we can expect, though, is after the poo bag of life has left, we’ll get another upswing of spirituality. 🙂

  15. When life hands you lemons, make lemonade. When life hands you poo, make ……………. [Time to be creative]

  16. I found myself nodding when I was reading this post as I can totally relate.I have often made the comment how I wish I could somehow get a “Spiritual IV” during conference that would last until the next conference..so I could continuously be sustained when life intrudes again. I found this phenomena to be true often when I am trying to go to the temple too.I wake up with a headache,I start running behind, everything seems to just not come together,hubby and I have a little spat,etc.I just say at those times, Hey,Satan..I am going to the temple no matter what obstacles are put in my way so you might as well leave me alone.And then I go anyway,and have a wonderful day of service and upliftment.(Is that a word?) I think Satan always likes to try to confound you when you are trying in attitude and actions to become closer to Heavenly Father,grow spiritually, and choose the right.

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