“One of the greatest sins of which the inhabitants of the earth are guilty today, is the sin of ingratitude.” Joseph F. Smith
“And in nothing doth man offend God, or against none is his wrath kindled, save those who confess not his hand in all things, and obey not his commandments.” D&C 59:21
It is pretty clear, God likes a grateful people.
Got it. And by the looks of Social Media, so do a lot of other people. On blogs, Twitter and Facebook, everyone spends the month of November talking about the things they are grateful for. Present company included. Last week I posted an epic list of 100 things I am grateful for. (The Annual Thankful List.)
It was easy – 100 things or 500 things. We should all be able to stop and do that any time of year. And I am being sincere. I am grateful for so many things, and have no problem telling the world about it.
But, as Hamlet said, “There’s the rub.”
Which leads me to what Charles Dudley Warner said, “Everybody talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it.” (No, it wasn’t Mark Twain.)
Can we at least stop talking about gratitude?
We all talk a good game when we talk about being grateful, but what are we actually doing to show it? Sure, I can make a list of 100 things I am grateful for, but…could I make a list of 100 things I have done to show my gratitude?
I doubt it. And I’m definitely not posting that list.
Nah – we should probably keep talking about it. How about we talk about gratitude, and then act on it? (Oooh, aaah. What a concept!)
First, how do we deal with both when it involves God? The talking part is easy – prayer. President Benson suggested prayer as a time to do that. He said:
“The Prophet Joseph said at one time that one of the greatest sins of which the Latter-day Saints would be guilty is the sin of ingratitude. I presume most of us have not thought of that as a great sin. There is a great tendency for us in our prayers and in our pleadings with the Lord to ask for additional blessings. But sometimes I feel we need to devote more of our prayers to expressions of gratitude and thanksgiving for blessings already received. We enjoy so much.” (link)
What can we DO to show our gratitude to God??
• Be obedient. “If ye love me, keep my commandments.” (John 14:15)
• Serve others. (Mosiah 2:17)
• Take care of that which we have been blessed with – whether it be intangibles, such as testimony and relationships, or tangible things we have been blessed with, like our bodies, and homes.
What can we DO to show people our gratitude?
• Serve them. (Funny how service works for God and people.)
• Tell them. Remember the story of Jesus healing the ten lepers? Only one of the ten came back and fell at the feet of the Savior and thanked him. (Luke 17:11-19) Nothing shows sincerity and gratitude like a face-to-face thank you.
• Write to them. On occasion I have had the great blessing of coming home to a note or letter from someone – completely out of the blue – thanking me for my influence in their life, or some other thing they appreciated. I keep those, and consider them gifts.
So, here is the MMM challenge, should you choose to accept it:
Rather than just talking about gratitude, I’m challenging all of us to DO something with it. Here’s my idea:
Think of someone who has made an impact in your life, someone you are truly grateful for, and tell them. Sounds too simple? Let’s make it a little trickier. Here’s some conditions:
1) Choose someone other than an immediate family member – no brothers, sisters, parents, kids, aunts uncles etc. Why? Because you should be doing this with them anyway. I would also suggest you don’t include close friends, or associates that you deal with frequently. Think of people who might actually be surprised to hear from you.
2) No thank you notes via email, Twitter, or Facebook. Write it down, deliver it, or send it. I know, it sounds primitive, but it matters. This is something that they will want to keep and re-read. I promise,. (I have a drawer where I put those gifts.)
3) You can do it in person. I missed an opportunity a few weeks ago at a movie theater when I ran into a former Bishop who I had not seen in years -he was very much a mentor to me. I could have taken just a minute and expressed my gratitude for his influence in my life – with my kids standing there listening – but I let the opportunity slip away.
4) See how much gratitude you can share between now and Thanksgiving. (A quiet Sunday afternoon or evening might be the perfect time.) Showing gratitude doubly blesses – both the giver and receiver.
(note: If you need to slip a little forgiveness into these expressions, that is a gift as well.)
I would love to know how it worked out for you, so if you would like to share your experience, leave acomment, or drop me a line. MMM@middleagedmormonman.com/home/.
“He who receiveth all things with thankfulness shall be made glorious” (D&C 78:19)
Here
pet peeve: lots of people are using FB as their personal gratitude journal.
advice: get a journal.
agree so much on DOing something about it.
great post.
I politely disagree. I have no problem with using FB as a forum to share gratitude – we need more of it in society, and it is better than memes or cat photos. But, as you can tell from my post, I think it rings a bit hollow if we don’t act on it.
Since my oldest was little we have tried to focus on both the Thanks AND the Giving of Thanksgiving (I see, Leigh kindly linked to our thanks & giving trees). I was pleasantly surprised when my oldest daughter who now attends BYU-I sent a photo of the Thanks & Giving trees she and her roommates set up (willow branches in a vase). It’s always nice when what you have worked so hard to teach your children actually sticks! Anyway, she commented that her roommates thought it was great to focus on serving others too as that was something they hadn’t really focused on before.
We are doing this idea this year (I blew them up really big) and think it is a great reminder to do the Thanks and the Giving part.
http://chocolateonmycranium.blogspot.com/2008/10/thanks-and-giving.html#.UolcBdKTift
Great post (both hers and yours)
Another relevant quote from Burke: No one could make a greater mistake than he who did nothing because he could do only a little. How often we make the mistake of thinking that an expression of gratitude is “only a little”.
A good post. One might say as much for many of the better feelings which we experience and casually express without any substantial action attached. What actions on our part demonstrate humility? What actions on our part demonstrate our sorrow for the misfortunes of others? What actions on our part demonstrate our charity towards others? What actions on our part demonstrate our loyalty to our divinely inspired Constitution? For better or worse, It is in Doing, that we Become. Action upon them is what solidifies and guarantees retention of our divine attributes, like exercise grows and maintains muscles. Inertia allows them to evaporate. Satan need not persuade us to do evil, if he can get us content to do nothing. All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing. Edmund Burke. It often escapes us that Burke’s insight was as valid on the individual level, as on the socio-political level.
you are so very right. And that’s the hard part.
MMM, this is a great post and I would like to thank you for your always thoughtful, usually inspirational and sometimes laugh-out-loud humorous posts. The one you did a month or so ago, based on D&C 123:7 was especially poignant for me and my family. That post really helped me, and my entire family, over a rough patch that we were going through the very week you wrote the post. I totally agree that we always need to express gratitude to those who truly make a difference in our lives.
A couple of years ago, I ran into a former teacher of my daughter. I took time to tell her how my daughter always said this woman was her favorite teacher and why. I was very happy I did that, because not long after that, the woman was killed in a car wreck. We never know how many opportunities we may or may not have to express gratitude.
Love this. For several years, my little family has done a “gratitude tree” where we write what we’re thankful for. This year, I felt prompted instead to let them pick a piece of paper with a blessing on it that also includes something to do. An example: we are thankful for our toys, choose some to donate to Goodwill; we are thankful for our neighbors, take them a treat with a note. It really does change the way you look at your blessings. 🙂
Becca, do you have a written list anywhere of the things you put on the tree? This is a wonderful idea.
Becca what a fun idea!
A really great way to teach about gratitude,service and love.
(I’d like a list too)
Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us. I appreciate the time you take to give us something to think about. I will accept your challenge and DO something to show my gratitude to others.