In my continuing quest to fill the world with goodness and light, I have decided to showcase it where I find it. Today, I am attempting an interview with the author of the recently published book “Covenant Motherhood.”
The author is Stephanie Dibb Sorensen. You might know her as the writer of the blog “Diapers & Divinity.” My first interaction with Stephanie was when I was a co-host of the Proclamation Celebration last year. This is Stephanie.
While I do have some great pictures of her looking like Mary Poppins, and one exceptional picture of her with her beloved cat on her head, I made a commitment that I would not mention them here, because this is serious business.
Speaking of serious business, here is my interview with Stephanie. Be prepared, this is my first blog interview, hopefully I won’t ask the same questions everybody else does. Look out David Frost!
1) Just so my readers can know you a little better, give me a quick breakdown of your family, your bio, and your blog.
Sure. Matt and I have been married for almost 14 years. We have 3 children, ages 10, 8, and 6. We recently landed in Utah after spending the first decade of our marriage in North Carolina and Minnesota. I started blogging in 2008 when Matt was in law school in Minnesota and my children were 5, 4, and 1, mostly because of Elder Ballard’s charge to use the Internet for good. I wondered how I could contribute and felt like I should start a blog, and the area I decided to focus on was finding faith in motherhood. That’s how Diapers and Divinity was born.
As far as my own bio, I served a mission in Argentina and was a Spanish professor for a few years before I started having children. Now that my children have all started school, I’m adjunct faculty in the Department of Church History and Doctrine at Brigham Young University. I teach just one class, and I really love doing that. I also teach for Especially for Youth in the summers.
2) This question may help my audience relate to you better: Taco Bell: Yes or No. If Yes, what is your favorite item.
Um, yes? I have probably been to Taco Bell less than five times in the last three years. I like that to-go box of twelve tacos when I’m in a real last-minute dinner bind. When I was in my late teens, I loved their Mexican Pizza, but it’s a lot lamer now than it was in the pre-budget-cut glory days.
3) Do you let your children drink soda?
I do, but I never buy it, so we don’t have any at our house except for contraband boxes of my husband’s Diet Dr. Pepper. If we ever go out to eat, I let them order a soda with their meals, but I rarely drink it. I’m a water girl, but occasionally I like a good root beer.
4) Your book is entitled “Covenant Motherhood.” When can people buy it? How did you orchestrate things so that a loving husband could buy it in time to give to his wife as a thoughtful Mother’s Day gift?
The book is already available in most LDS Bookstores (Deseret Book, Seagull, etc.) both in store and online. You can also get in on Amazon now, at least for Kindle, and I think the physical books should be in stock there soon. When the book was picked up by Covenant Communications for publication, they specifically wanted to use it as part of their Mother’s Day lineup for 2013, so I guess the orchestration credit really goes to them.
5) Please summarize the idea behind the book in such a way that even a guy might understand it.
Gentlemen: There may be days when you come home from work and your wife looks like she wants to jump in the car and head for the hills. Doing motherhood right is hard, hard work and it stretches women in ways that are sometimes painful. When you see her exhaustion or frustration, you may wonder if she even likes being a mom. She does. She knows motherhood is important, and she loves your children, but sometimes, it’s hard to remember whyit’s important, and she wants validation that all the little things she does every day really make a difference. The book explores how all the various roles of motherhood are reflections of the role that Jesus Christ plays in our lives, and it tries to remind mothers how much their daily service can bring them closer to Him and bless His children.
6) My theory is that no one should be allowed to write, or blog, about how to parent until the majority of their kids have successfully left the nest. What is there about your book that makes it the exception to my theory?
I think your theory is valid, especially if the book were a parenting how-to book. This book is not. The book was born from my own personal journey to understand the doctrinal underpinnings of motherhood–to try to see my role the way God sees it and to learn from it what He wants me to learn. That journey included a lot of personal study and prayer and pondering, and the book is the result of that search. I don’t pretend to be an expert on motherhood, and I hope that’s clear in the book itself, but I do have a testimony of it. I hope that testimony can encourage mothers in whatever stage of parenting they are in.
(Note: I already knew it wasn’t a parenting book, but thought this was a great opportunity to espouse my theory.)
7) You make a wonderful point about how Motherhood emulates what the Savior did/does for us. How do you react to the idea that 95% of the mothers in the world have no idea that what they do is next to God?
I’m a big fan of The Family: A Proclamation to the World, and it declares that “family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children.” This is true whether people know it or believe it, and I think that is why people across cultural and religious boundaries can find happiness and security in family life. President Uchtdorf recently spoke about how at the end of people’s lives, their greatest joys and regrets are often associated with how they have interacted with their families. Scientific studies have showed over and over again how healthy family life leads to success in many different areas of well-being. So, regardless of whether or not people acknowledge God’s hand in motherhood, I think His hand is blessing all those who try to honor the institution of family.
8) I know lots of non-LDS parents who do not understand the gospel underpinnings of parenthood, yet they are turning out tremendous kids, and I also know a lot of LDS people who understand the gospel that are struggling as they raise their kids. Why is that?
Truth is truth, and the LDS Church does not have the corner market on all light in the world. Good parents everywhere teach their children values and skills that are in harmony with gospel teachings: hard work, faith, kindness, respect, etc., and their children and families are blessed for it. I think a lot of LDS moms feel an overwhelming sense of responsibility for raising up children unto the Lord, and sometimes it seems so hard and we feel a lot of pressure to do it right. Satan knows well the potential of covenant families and he attacks mothers with discouragement and self-doubt and tries to rob them of confidence and hope. That worry can be compounded when children struggle. I think that’s why the doctrine is so important to understand; It takes truth to dispel the lies Satan tells us about the value and power of our role.
9) Do you feel loved when people refer to you online as Mary Poppins and Photoshop your head onto Mary Poppins costumes? If not, why?
I kind of like Mary Poppins. She’s proper and kind, but firm. And she has a much smaller waist than I do, so those photos are kind of flattering. The cat, though? Stop it.
10) Was it difficult on your husband to have you take the time to write this book while in the midst of raising a family – or is it just “payback” for law school?
I’m going to let him answer that. Matt, take it away:
It was not hard on me to have Stephanie write this book. There were a couple of months that were pretty intense while she wrote the bulk of the chapters, but nothing beyond reason. It has been strengthening to me to watch her begin this journey with a few questions about motherhood, and watch the revelation and learning come over months and years. She has spent many hours on her computer, doing a wide variety of activities, including writing the book. The great thing about what she chooses to spend her time on, is that it blesses me and our children because it makes her stronger. I’m proud of her and have no problems or concerns with her devotion to her work. I believe that God has given her certain gifts and her blogging, writing and teaching is her way of using her gifts to bless the lives of others. Since I don’t feel that our family is suffering due to some “sacrifice” she is making, I fully encourage her and support the things she feels impressed to do.
11) If you had known how tough it would be to write this book, and get it published, would you still have done it?
Yes. I felt prompted to write the book, and the more I pushed it off, the stronger it became. I knew I was supposed to write it, and I felt a real sense of accomplishment and relief when I finished it and submitted the manuscript.
12) Would it have been worth it personally to write it, even if it never saw the light of day?
Again, yes. Like I said, I knew I was supposed to write it, but I had no idea if it was supposed to be read. Once I knew it was going to be published, I was actually scared because it feels kind of vulnerable. But if it helps another mom to gain a deeper testimony of her role, then I will be really happy about that.
13) Who were you thinking of as you wrote it, and who do you think might be most blessed by reading it?
Because the doctrines of motherhood are universal, I think the book can offer something meaningful to moms in all different stages, but I especially hope it can help mothers in those very busy and exhausting early years. That’s part of the reason I wrote it now instead of waiting until all my children are grown; I wanted to write it while I could still remember all those feelings of a young mother. When I kept getting prompted over and over to write it, even though I knew it would be hard to find the time with young children, I also had a sense that Heavenly Father was helping me to remember those feelings and the things I’d learned in my crazy young-mother years, and if I didn’t act on it soon, He might take them away.
Bonus Question: Who is your favorite Middle-aged Mormon male blogger?
Oh, that’s easy. Mike Henneke.
Just kidding. You, of course. But if you hadn’t said “blogger,” it would be my husband by a long shot.
——
Well there you have it: Everything you need to know about Stephanie and her new book. Read it, it is good. You can buy it HERE.
(Guys, this is a no-brainer for Mother’s Day, and we already established that she likes Taco Bell, and is super-righteous. Can’t go wrong on this one.)
My thanks to Stephanie for being willing to answer every question, except the one she pawned off on her husband. I wish you great success!
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I think I would love Stephanie’s book since my kids are raised and gone and then I wouldn’t feel any guilt about how I suck at it all.
And Mike has a blog? huh.
Too bad Stephanie wrote this book AFTER all my kids grew up. I don’t get to benefit as a young mom from Stephanie’s book. I wrecked my chance to do motherhood right! Fortunately, my kids are none the worse off for my incompetency.
Anyway, Stephanie, I hope your book helps many women discover new insights into mothering.
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My Daughter is expecting her first baby in July. I’ve decided to order this book for her for Mother’s Day! If my local LDS bookstore has it, I’ll read it first.
Your answer to the soda question could have been mine. My husband continues to buy Coke Zero, even though I’ve begged him to stop. I decided last summer to make a real effort to stop drinking soda. My son had just visited from Japan and left me with 2 boxes of large sized tea bags (makes 1 quart) of barley and rooibos tea. It took time and persistence and some cutting of the tea with vitamin water to get used to the new flavors, but now I like it and drink it unsweetened!
I appreciate a good, serious interview, so thanks! I will plan on reading Stephanie’s book, as I am also a ‘big fan’ of the family proclamation and always looking for ways to understand its importance and apply it well in our lives today.
I finished reading Stephanie’s book while in the hospital having my tenth child. It is beautiful! I loved that it was written to show us how to apply the Savior’s example in our own lives, right where we are at, whether we have 1 or 10 children.
And I ordered it for Mother’s Day for my own mother, sisters and older daughters.
Love this interview! Although all my children are out of the house and my husband is in the Spirit World preaching the Gospel, the book is one I would definitely recommend to my children.
OK. It’s amazing how when I’m feeling down especially about mommyhood, something like this interferes. Can’t wait to read this book. Thanks. and Thanks.
Stephanie I am so excited to read your book! The attempts to undermine motherhood these days seem to be increasing, even from some members of the church I know. It is so nice to have amazing women step up and share their testimonies of motherhood. Thank you for your hard work!