Sorry, please indulge me as I add two amazing, quotes to the discussion on anger that I said was finished.
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“A man who cannot control his temper is not very likely to control his passion, and no matter what his pretensions in religion, he moves in daily life very close to the animal plane”
President David O. McKay, Improvement Era, June 1958, p. 407.
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“We begin to notice, besides our particular sinful acts, our sinfulness; begin to be alarmed not only about what we do, but about what we are. This may sound rather difficult, so I will try to make it clear from my own case. When I come to my evening prayers and try to reckon up the sins of the day, nine times out of ten the most obvious one is some sin against charity; I have sulked or snapped or sneered or snubbed or stormed. And the excuse that immediately springs to my mind is that the provocation was so sudden and unexpected: I was caught off my guard, I had not time to collect myself. Now that may be an extenuating circumstance as regards those particular acts: they would obviously be worse if they had been deliberate and premeditated.
On the other hand, surely what a man does when he is taken off his guard is the best evidence for what sort of a man he is? Surely what pops out before the man has time to put on a disguise is the truth? If there are rats in a cellar you are most likely to see them if you go in very suddenly. But the suddenness does not create the rats: it only prevents them from hiding. In the same way the suddenness of the provocation does not make me an ill-tempered man: it only shows me what an ill-tempered man I am. The rats are always there in the cellar, but if you go in shouting and noisily they will have taken cover before you switch on the light.”
C.S. Lewis, in Mere Christianity.
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Yes, you have my permission to go back and read them both again, I’ll wait….
Back? Amazing, aren’t they?! I intended to use both of them, but they got away from me.
Back? Amazing, aren’t they?! I intended to use both of them, but they got away from me.
Special thanks to “Anonymous” for directing me to this quote. I get a lot of comments from “Anonymous”, and I must say that he/she is wildly inconsistent.
Here
“Special thanks to “Anonymous” for directing me to this quote. I get a lot of comments from “Anonymous”, and I must say that he/she is wildly inconsistent.”
You crack me up! I loved the quotes as well, but the side stuff is why I keep coming back.
Super.
I did a good deed and caught a cold from it…17 days later I have entered back into life and am awakened to the harsh realities of my faults by fleas on my dog and rats in my cellar. I think I’m relapsing.
My vote was on sadness.
Hmm I definitely have rats. Seems like it might be well to send in the cats before I go in suddenly. Only problem is I am allergic to cats. Guess I’ll just have to repent and humble up. Anger is certainly my worst weakness.
Excellent quotes!
So, next topic: Is it a sin to feel depressed? That would open a fun new barrel of worms!
I’ve struggled with depression for a long time and a friend told me once that her father said it was a sin to be depressed. That sure didn’t help me any at the time, but I’m ready to consider it now. Perhaps there’s a difference between chemical depression where there’s really some kind of physical problem causing it, and the kind of depression where you just let yourself be gloom and doom all the time.
Anyway, it would an interesting topic!
Yes, there is a difference, and yes, we need to be very careful before labeling mental illness as sinful. I have someone very close to me with clinical depression, who has had some negative experiences along those lines with ignorant Church leaders. We need to be avoid being like the disciples who asked whose sin had caused a man to be blind. I’m sure everyone spends some time feeling sorry for him/herself, which is a very ungrateful and uncharitable attitude- and preventable.
Yes, I know there is a big difference, but it can be hard to know if you personally have one or the other. Such as, do I have a “sinful” attitude I need to work on, or a serious health problem I need to have addressed?
It is very sad, though somewhat understandable when a church leader doesn’t know how to address the problem and really help someone.
This is something that can be easily googled. I can say this with confidence because I have, indeed, chemical Depression, and I am, currently, on medication for it. There are many websites out there that outline what Depression is and how it differs from just being negative, cynical, or sad.
I should have gotten my Depression looked at in 2001. I waited until 2007. Being on medication and doing therapy was the best thing I ever did. If you think you might have real Depression after learning about the definitions, see a therapist (or a psychiatrist –they can actually prescribe meds AND give counseling). Good luck!
Holly, it is not a sin to feel depressed. Blessed are the poor in spirit, the Savior taught. Quite a number of our general authorities have taught in recent years about the reality that depression is an illness — Elder Uchtdorf and Elder Morrison. There certainly normative standards to assess one’s depression, and a mental health professional (including those at LDS Family Services) can help with that.
Depression runs in my family (siblings of mine, of my wife, and some of our children). I visited with a competant therapist who helped me with mine without medication, though we discussed under what conditions I might consider medication, as well.
Sorry — Elder Uchtdorf and Elder Morrison, among others…
One thing I did years ago to help me with anger issues is to be a little more practical about it. For example, if someone said something that I chose to get angry about I would tell myself,”I know I’m going to forgive them…so how long am I going to be mad. 2 weeks, 2 days?” It seemed silly to me when I set a time limit on it. After using this method for a time, I realized that it was much easier to never get angry in the first place because it only hurt me. And since I knew I was going to get over it, it just wasn’t worth getting angry about. The same can be said for being offended.
Although anger isn’t generally one thing I struggle with on a daily basis, it still creeps up from time to time. I quickly repent and invite the Spirit back into my heart and move forward. It’s simple…not easy. It gets easier as you develop the skills to help you through the temptation to get angry.
Anger is a choice…a bad choice.
linda, this is great! I might have to try this (putting a time limit on it). Anger is a tough one with me…
Wow, wow, wow. I’ve said it before and I’m sure I’ll say it again; you made my day MMM. I need a daily dose of CS Lewis. I always look forward to reading your posts. I wonder, are you this witty and wise in your personal life?
Absolutely not.
CS Lewis = awesome. Yeah, and ok, that David O. McKay is no slouch, either. Thanks!
I really, really love the rats in the cellar quote. I came across it a while ago at Misfit Cygnet and it stopped me up short. I have a lot of rats in my cellar, unfortunately.