Due to distractions, and poor planning on my part, it proved necessary for me to go back to work last night to finish some things that were deadline related. With my EC traveling, I waited until the kids were well-situated, and big brother returned home before I went to the office. It was about 11:30pm before I actually got there and got cracking.
I worked through the night, courtesy of Mt. Dew and Ruffles Sour Cream and Cheddar potato chips. With bleary eyes, I wrapped things up around 4:45 this morning. On my way home, it occurred to me that it would be the prefect time to get some stuff I needed at the store without having to fight the crowds- so off to Walmart I went.
Turns out that this particular Walmart doesn’t open until 5:00am. So, I actually stood outside the sliding door waiting until they unlocked it. What a geek. It felt really odd being the first customer.
Apparently there is a door prize for being the first customer of the day, because when I passed by the bakery/deli area, one of the bakery people asked me if I would like a free donut. What a stupid question. Of course I want a free donut. (For those who are concerned, it was a raised donut with chocolate icing.
One of the best parts about going to Walmart is the people watching. As I have mentioned before, there is actually a website dedicated to taking less than flattering pictures of Walmart shoppers. The refer to them as “People of Walmart.” It is always fun to see if there are any contenders at our store. But, at 5:01am, there were precious few other customers.
I went on with my shopping…
Hang on – let me back up and do some description to help set the scene:
Last night, when I went back to work, it was all about comfort. I wore flip-flops, some baggy shorts, and an old, beat-up BYU shirt. I ended up staying there all night, and emerged into the daylight with gigantic dark circles under my red, tired eyes. I don’t know if there were crumbs on my old shirt, but there were, at best, grease spots. My hair was disheveled, and I had my reading glasses perched on my nose. All-nighters used to be so much easier…
Now we can return to my shopping…
With donut in hand, I took a shortcut that lead me through the clothing department. Smack dab in front of me was one of those “People of Walmart.” I took of my glasses, only to realize that it wasn’t a “People of Walmart”- it was me!
Worse yet – I had become one of them!
I was leaning against my cart, munching on a donut, looking like a poster child for insomnia – dressed like a slob.
I’m hoping nobody took my picture…
Now that I have shared this abject humiliation with you, my loyal readers – I’m going to bed.
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hahahaha!!! LOVE IT!
I probably looked the same at the ER last night with my 5 year old… but then, I was in the ER with my 5 year old, so it was probably a little more excusable. 😉
Raised chocolate donut? I’m jealous….
I’m proud of you for noticing that.
we don’t have a walmart close but I found that when i stepped out into the sun the other day all the food and boogers that my kids had put on my clothing that day were gleaming in the sun light I looked straight up crazy and it was the middle of the day
Kind of related story: My second baby was born on Thanksgiving Day, and my poor husband had been up all night after a long day of working a hard manual labor job, so he was wearing rumpled, dirty clothes. Anyway, the hospital said that they had a thanksgiving dinner for me, but not for him (I still can’t believe that). So he decided to go to a local restaurant to get a meal. He walked in and they asked him if he’d like the Thanksgiving Dinner. He thought, sure… sounded good to him. As he was eating his meal he started looking around and realized that everyone around him looked pretty shabby too. When he finished eating they told him to have a nice Thanksgiving and that he didn’t have to pay. We found out later that that restaurant does a Thanksgiving dinner for homeless people. Apparently nobody batted an eye when my husband walked in. 😉
That is really funny.
That is hilarious.
I see. So “MMM” is you under normal, upright circumstances. Under other conditions you fall on your face, becoming “WWW” — the Woeful WalMart Werewolf.
Pretty clever for a Saturday morning, my dear.
My husband told me once he went to wal-mart in a wrestling singlet and cowboy boots because he had nothing else to wear.
I surely hope that is the real reason.
Don’t they take those pictures with a hidden camera? We, your loyal readers, better keep watching that Walmart website and see if we can spot you. ºÜº
My sister and I were going to see Wicked and so were all gussied up but I remembered my sons needed diapers so we ran to Walmart. We got some crazy weird looks being all dressed up. I think we freaked some people out!
One day, as I stood in Walmart looking at the tabloids (yes, I confess I do that…), it occurred to me that the celebrities so idolized are just Walmart people with money.
ha ha ha
😮 (We’ve all been there.)