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Please Stop Saying That: High Councildude

• This is the fourth of a series of things that we hear at church on a regular basis that I wish people would stop saying. They are not big, honkin’, scary things, just little expressions that you hear frequently that just don’t quite work. (Grammatically or doctrinally) The introduction to this series is here.

(FYI: Yoda is not a member of the High Council in an LDS Stake. He is a member of the Jedi High Council. They are not the same thing. Just want to be clear.)

In the LDS Church, every Stake has a High Council. It is a group of 12 men who sit in council with the Stake Presidency. Members of the High Council have many important assignments, and are called on to take care of many essential aspects of running a Stake.  It has been said that high councilors have all the responsibility, with none of the authority. They function with authority delegated by the Stake Prsident. (It is a great calling.)

Members of the High Council are most well-known for the talks they regularly give in the local congregations. Part of church culture is the running joke that the high council are ultra-boring speakers. Unfortunately, this legacy is often well-deserved. (YMMV.)

Over the years, I have noticed that many members of the Church don’t know what to call a man serving in the High Council. In my ever continuing quest to help each and every member of the church know what they are talking about, I will do my best to instruct.

Four common attempts:

1) High Councilman.  NOPE. Sorry, no such thing, although this is very common.

2) High Counselor. NOPE. He doesn’t counsel, he is on a council. But it is tricky, because it sounds just like…
3) High Councilor.  YES. This works
4) Member of the High Council: YES. Also acceptable, albeit cowardly.

The easiest way to test if you are using the term correctly is by using it in a complete sentence.  For example:

• The definition of a good high councilor talk is that it should have a good beginning, and a good ending, and they should be as close together as possible.

or

• Have you heard about he high councilor who dreamed he was speaking in church and woke up and found that he was?

or

• High councilor talks always have a happy ending – everyone is happy when they end.

or

• If you took all the Mormons who have fallen asleep when a high councilor was speaking and laid them end to end, they’d be more comfortable.

So, no more high council, man.

(Please note: Any comments that include both the names Yoda and Kimball will be immediately deleted. Not because they aren’t hysterical, but because they are.)

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Comments

  1. M-W.com has councilman as the word in their dictionary following councilor. Same definition. They also show the preferred spelling of the term you’ve chosen as councillor. Just sayin’.
    Also, since a council is, “an assembly or meeting for consultation, advice, or discussion” then it would seem appropriate to use the word counselor as well, since that is a person who offers counsel or advice. I think the real misuse is when people confuse the verb counsel (give advice) with the noun council (a meeting with other boring speakers).

    1. If I recall, I was going by the church Handbook when I wrote this post, not the dictionary.

  2. I might have been guilty of the high councilman error. I’ll have to watch for it. Pop quiz: elders quorum, elders’ quorum, or elder’s quorum?

  3. 1. The word “Internet” is ALWAYS capitalized.
    2. I was a high councilor and we counseled but were not called as counselors.
    3. Best high council joke – it’s long though: A plane bound for SLC is hijacked and the hijackers decide to display force. They choose 3 passengers: A bishop, a Primary president, and a high councilor and ask if they have a last request before they are executed. The Primary President says, “Yes, I’d like to lead the whole plane in a primary song.” The high councilor says, “Yes, I’ve been working on a talk – it’s my best ever. I’ll share it.” The bishop looks at the other two and says, “Yes, I have a request…kill me after the song.”

  4. Just to let you know there is at least one unit on earth where high councilor speakers are looked forward to eagerly, at least by me, as they are usually the best speakers we have all month! We are in a tiny branch in Iowa where few know how to give an interesting, enlightening, spiritual talk in Sacrament Meeting. I’ve heard more, well, if not false doctrine, pretty close to it, here than anywhere I’ve lived. I miss living in the Celestial Kingdom (Provo Oak Hills Stake).

    1. I cringe every time someone from Utah says they live in Zion or a Celestial ward. (She says as she prepares to move to Provo. Haha!)

  5. Thank you for the clarification. Those sentence examples are hilarious! I bet you tell other great jokes in your talks as a High Councilor (see, you’re a great teacher).

  6. Thank you for the clarification. Those sentence examples are hilarious! I bet you tell other great jokes in your talks as a High Councilor (see, aren’t I a good student?).

  7. I believe you are wrong about the Yoda thing. A few months back we had a very old high councilor come to our Sacrament Meeting. When he stood up to speak, my three-year-old got very excited. She stood up on the pew, pointed at him, and said loudly “YODA! Look, Mom, it’s YODA!!!”

    And she is always right. So there you go.

  8. In my college ward at BYU I heard one gal telling a foreign student who was learning English that the women’s organization in the church was called “release society.” Luckily another sister was nearby and said, “Uh…no it’s RELIEF Society!

  9. Good points, MAMM. One that I always notice is the myriad incorrect pronunciations of “Ensign,” the church magazine. Let’s break up the word: En•sign. See, was that so hard? But people say Ensen, Enzen, Enzine, Enzyme… The inside of the magazine gives the correct pronunciation every month.

    Also, I had a home teaching companion who said with crystal clarity “The Ironic Priesthood.” I kid you not, and I don’t exaggerate it. At first, I thought I misheard it or figured it wasn’t quite that bad. But he said it a few more times, and it was definitely the long “I” sound. This was obviously from the prophet Iron Man.

  10. I have heard rumors about that last sentence about they who shall not be named together for quite some time. Maybe Frank Oz converted back when Steve Martin did.

Add your 2¢. (Be nice.)

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