I haven’t really been paying attention to the news, but apparently the end of the world is scheduled for this Saturday, May 21, 2011. It is referred to as “The Rapture” which instantly makes me think of the Blondie song. It is exciting! There are some downsides, but there are upsides as well – such as not having to watch the American Idol finale next week.
I do appreciate them narrowing the Rapture down to the specific day, but I wish they could give me a 2-4 hour window like the cable guy does. This does have an immediate impact on my life, and thankfully I still had time to adjust my To-Do lists for both Friday and Saturday. Good thing!
Wake up, get family up for scriptures and school.
Bring in trash cans from curb.
Be on time to work.
Finish work deadlines.
Pay car payment.
Tell wife about speeding ticket.
Backup computer.
Write clever blog post.
Take vitamins
Put down toilet seat
Pick up dog poop.
Mow lawn.
Prepare Sunday School lesson.
Watch Sportscenter
FRIDAY
Taco Bell for lunch.
Turn off all alarm clocks Thursday night.
Let kids stay home from school.
Show up to work at 11:00am.
Play Angry Birds until lunch.
Play Angry Birds until lunch.
Lunch at Noon. (Still Taco Bell)
Photocopy middle-finger, fax to IRS.
Give all employees 50% raises, effective next pay period.
Leave work at 2:00pm.
Take EC and kids to Pirates 4 matinee.
Extra butter on extra large popcorn.
Use car payment money to take 20 closest friends to Outback
Eat Ben & Jerry’s “Everything But The…”
Kiss EC a lot, etc.
Spend midnight to 2:00am on knees repenting.
SATURDAY
Get up at 4:00am and resume repenting.
Drop tithing and HUGE fast offerings check at bishop’s house.
Give all credit cards to homeless people.
Give all credit cards to homeless people.
Take kids to breakfast at Denny’s. Grand Slam extra bacon, extra sausage, spring for the large orange juice.
Buy 1 gallon of gas for SUV.
Go to temple, hope timing is good.
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Nice. I think I’m just going to go and hide in my closet until I’m found. Just to make the time go by, I’ll read the scriptures. Maybe that will help my soul…
I’m just gonna forget the other stuff and stay in the temple all day! Good call!
Loved this post. Very funny.
Silly! Of course not! I usually look at it the week before, then stew on it and study during the week – then put it together on Saturday. I mean seriously, what kind of teacher would wait until Saturday to prepare a lesson! Or Sunday, or in the lobby during Sacrament meeting.
You wait ’till Saturday (and not morning, I see ) to plan your Sunday School Lesson??
Ah, the rapture. But it’s only for the super-righteous, so I am preparing myself for my five months of hell. My guess is it will be a Keaneu Reeves movie marathon.
Cheeseboy: Ouch!
Your Friday list almost looks exactly like Rebecca Black’s Friday song.
Kinda a bummer that the Pirates movie is going to make hardly any money.
Wahoo I now have a debt forgiveness plan!
Sounds like a plan! At least we don’t have to worry about the Mayan calandar running out in December anymore.
You are too funny! My autistic son was so upset when one of his teachers mentioned this…he believes everything he is told. One day a football coach told him if he didn’t do the drill right he would make him run until he was dead…I’ve never seen him run so fast in his entire life!
Sandy